How TF Did I Survive?!

Healing is by no means a linear process. Throughout my personal journey these past few months, as cliche as it sounds, I have learned more about myself, others, and the world than I could have imagined. But that does not mean it hasn’t just FU*KING SUCKED every step along the way!

Where to Start?

Well, sadness was the first step after peeling myself out of bed and re-joining the real world. I’m not going to lie and act like I didn’t wallow and wasn’t consumed for longer than I’d like to admit by this soul crushes and life-ending sadness because I was. But as I slowly moved through the steps of healing as a bystander and never tried to force them, that was when I saw the actual change. But now, 6 months later, I can confidently say I am healed and happy again! So, while reflecting on the past months, there have been a few significant things I’ve done/chosen throughout that have led me to this point!

Tips, Tricks, Important Moments/Decisions

1. DO! NOT! JUST! GO! SLEEP! AROUND! I’m telling you that you will be WAY happier with yourself afterwards if you don’t just jump into the arms/bed of a stranger or make your way around. Take time to heal within yourself and rebuild your sense of individuality and life feels SO MUCH better on the other side!
2. Idk about anyone else, but I have never been able to write well with a pen and paper. I get bored; it looks ugly and doesn’t work. However, at the beginning of month four, I started keeping a video diary on my computer, which I treated like a confessional, and that changed my life. If there is one thing I wish I could have thought of sooner or started sooner, it would be 1000% that! Not only did it help me process my emotions and talk out my trains of thought, but it also happened in a safe environment in digestible chunks. Just me and my computer photo booth camera where I would talk EVERYTHING out and to death until I felt genuinely physically lighter – and it ALWAYS worked!

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